The Thriver's Guide to Medical School by Olivia Richman

Author:Olivia Richman [Richman, Olivia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781637305010
Publisher: Olivia Richman
Published: 2021-12-09T10:57:35+00:00

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Overcomer’s Story

As I was doing research for this chapter, I read at least a dozen stories about physicians who shared their relationship with drugs, alcohol, or other negative coping habits. One common theme I noticed was that each physician was high-achieving, high-functioning, and intelligent. But each physician was also in a perpetual state of discontent and often felt unhappy, empty, and powerless in life. They turned to alcohol or drugs to solve their seemingly unmanageable lives. If you don’t have a substance use problem, please continue reading in case you come to a point in your career where you have the chance to help someone who does.

Since alcoholism and substance use runs in my family, I’m familiar with the disease and the recovery program. I understand it’s associated with chronic feelings of inferiority, discontentment, and inauthenticity. But, since this is the Overcomer’s Story section, I selected a vulnerable share by an anonymous physician whose story was borrowed from Physician Health Services (PHS), a Massachusetts-based medical society addressing issues of physician health. We will call the doctor in the story Dr. Bob, in honor of one of the cofounders of Alcoholics Anonymous, who was a surgeon in the 1900s.

I was struck sober, lying on my living room floor, unable to get up, bleeding from a gastric ulcer just before Labor Day weekend in 2004. That is where this amazing journey in sobriety began.

Dr. Bob grew up in a small town in Eastern Massachusetts. He and his two older brothers would spend their summers playing in the woods, riding bikes, and hanging out with other neighborhood kids. But from an early age, he felt like an outsider. The first time he finally felt he belonged was when one of the older kids handed him a cigarette to smoke. He was ten years old. When his brothers started high school, they found their own cliques and became more distant. Bob, yet again, felt alone.

He finally felt a sense of belonging and connection when he joined the high school marching band. He had friends, purpose, and even his older brother, who was part of the club. His first distinct memory of having a drink was the night before his first jazz band rehearsal.

What a great feeling of belonging I had had—something I had never felt before.

Before Bob knew it, he began drinking or smoking marijuana nearly every day. He would often visit his brothers, who were now in college, and would find himself waking up in a dorm room one or two days later, unaware of what had happened within the past twenty-four to forty-eight hours. He soon came to realize that this was called a blackout.

Despite my increasingly frequent substance use, I excelled as a student.

Bob prided himself on taking all honors classes, passing them with ease, and putting himself near the top of his class. He never got in trouble, nor did any faculty consider he had a problem. Bob decided to study medicine and took a premed class when he started college.

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